And when it rains...

Because of Georgia Lil Pea, i shall start blogging and bore all of you with very long boring blog posts again.

Blogger georgia little pea said...
Dear Anny, I'm pretty sure I saw a post on your dad on my GR yesterday or the day before. I didn't have time to read it because I was on my way to Brisbane. What happened? Did you delete it? Hope you're okay x
28 February, 2013 19:29

Blogger georgia little pea said...
ANNY, I'm feeling a bit twilight zone here. I don't see my comment, though you must have, because you wrote me. I guess you deleted it since it was Irrelevant to this post, which is fine.
I know I saw something else last night on my GR, in passing, and I don't see it here today. About your dad again. PLEASE! What is going on?! Am I nuts?
03 March, 2013 04:42

Thank you to The Typist for kicking my ass and getting me back to writing a very long post for you to read :) You've really thought i've conked right?

~ 19th Feb 2013
Here I am waiting for my train home. Another hour to burn. A macchiato maybe? Starbucks just 10 feet away. Starbucks is where we usually hang out for long catching up chats when i go to Kuala Lumpur. Hoity toity coffee. I could get a normal coffee for 1/10 of the price but we love to do the hoity toity coffee once in a while.

Its raining. The heavens weep. Or perhaps a good wash before they welcome another angel in their folds. She's on the way to Penang again for her final journey to the open seas.

She has finally left us. She passed away on Monday in her sleep. A peaceful death. I am glad. Glad.. happy.. that she does not need to suffer anymore. Her sufferings have finally ended.

Only her ashes came home to Kuala Lumpur in an urn for funeral rites. She was cremated in Penang and brought home on the day she passed away. Her father's wishes. He doesn't want the body to suffer anymore.

It is still Chinese New Year here in my country. CNY usually is about 15 days of celebration. Some people would not come for a funeral as its their beliefs. Some will fear bad luck if they visit a funeral during the CNY. Friends and family however will show up.

I have spent Monday in tears. I am all dried up yesterday. I know she would not want to see us cry. It will hurt her more to see us all in tears. I believe her spirit was with us that night. Even when we went out looking for vegetarian dishes for the prayer table. She was with us in the car directing us all the way like she always does. She was our human GPS. She knows the roads of Kuala Lumpur like the back of her hands.

Don't really know what the days ahead will be yet but I will try and make them remarkable. Time to mend some ties and its time to start keeping appearances with some people.

What makes her different from most of my friends? I have lots of friends but I choose to keep appearances with only a few.

I've known her for 20+ years. We practically spent most of our wild years doing nothing wild and have a good time. We have been through laughther, tears and mostly everything else. I was never angry with her.. not even once. I don't even remember both of us ever having a fight. She was like my soul sister. She trusts me with her secrets and I tell her most of mine. We know to call each other when we needed someone to talk to. We are always available for each other. Sometimes we spend hours and hours on the phone to catch up on lost time.

When she is sad, she always eats ice-cream. We've sat on kerbs outside 7-Eleven sharing a whole tub of ice-cream. It always makes her feel better.

3rd March 2013

She came into my life like instant coffee or instagram. She was instantly my friend. I liked her the first time we became friends. We had many adventures together doing stupid not too wild things. Usually we love to go on road trips and pig out. Sometimes with a whole bunch of people... and sometimes just the two of us when the rest didn't want to catch up. We could go anywhere together, and most of the time, she'll leave me alone to do my picture taking and sometimes she begged me to take her pictures. She doesn't understand why i rather take pictures of windows.. old buildings... or tiles.

I do have a lot of pictures of her. I am currently working on a photobook for her family. Her father misses her most. He could use some good memories of her. I don't know when i'll finish it. It is sometimes quite hard to do the photobook when my vision suddenly blurrs out when i remember how and when the picture was taken and what we did that day.

She has led quite an eventful life. She started working very hard when she left school. She started working 12 hr days and it went on to 16 hr days and sometimes at 12 midnight she'll call me and tell me that she's still waiting for materials to arrive. I do not know of anyone who has worked so hard from the beginning and never quite spend much on herself. She'll give and give it all away to her family... sometimes to friends and to whoever who asked. That's her.

Over the years, we have had other friends and other groups of people in our lives, but somehow we'll go back to this group of people we grew up with. She was with another close group of friends before she got sick. But somehow, she came back to us again. Somehow she was comfortable with us. We understand her from the beginning.

She only started being good to herself in the last three years. She started travelling abroad. She went from Dubai to London to Spain to the USA to Australia and to some Asian countries. She was finally happy and finally willing to spend some money on herself. I've always told her to go out there... spend some money. You have kept enough money, spend on yourself. Don't worry about taking care of other people, love yourself sometimes.

She's at the time of her life when she has made enough to lead a comfortable life but it has to be taken away from her in a most horrible way.

I knew her ending was near. I knew she was going to go. I sometimes pray that her ending will come fast and painless. There's no cure. It has gone too far. A miracle doesn't happen all the time.

We didn't make it for her last birthday. She managed to hold on till her birthday. Birthdays meant everything to her. She used to have a countdown... she'll have celebrations a few days before her birthday. All the way to her birthday. She was a Valentine girl.

Her family was with her. They did a recording of the birthday in the hospital. It was very sad to watch but she was happy that day. Very happy and she even manage to blow out the candles. 4 days after her birthday, she gave up. She passed away peacefully in her sleep with her sister sleeping beside her.

For the past 20+ years of my life... she has not missed texting or calling me at 12 midnight on each of my birthdays. Birthdays meant so much to her. She always try to make other people's birthdays special too.

Anybody can get cancer. Cancer cells are in all of us. It can happen anytime but being unhappy or being stressed could just bump up the speed more. Forgiveness is good. Being resentful or being angry over the littlest of things doesn't do any good to anyone.

I spend a day crying.. just sobbing away. Everything blurrs out. The tears just kept coming. Then i started stuffing myself with rice. I don't know why. That's how i deal with grieve. When mom passed away, i just kept eating and made sure everyone ate. Because life must go on no matter what.

We can blame everything on situations. We can blame it on other people. We can stop living and just keep crying day after day. We can stop working and just blame it on sadness. We can blame everyone and the death of a friend by not doing anything the whole day. But time will still tick and go on. We can take some time to grieve but life goes on in the most hardest way. It has to still go on.

I believe she is still with us in some moments of our lives. We carry her in our memories. I might not find such a wonderful friend again, but i still have Dom. He'll make sure i wake up and get up from bed. He'll make sure i eat and go for walks. He'll make sure to let me know i am loved.

I saw the tiniest orange butterfly in the kitchen the other day. I just hi to the butterfly and asked.. is it youuuuuuuuuuuuu. *LOL* Then i took its picture. A tiny grasshopper came to the kitchen yesterday while i was cooking. I asked again, is it youuuuuuuuuuuuuu again? Not very nice colors today. I assume the black and white bird in the garden is mum. I see it everywhere i go. My mom did mention to my nephew sometime back that when she passes, she wants to be a bird and just be free. It works and it keep and helps people like me move on.

My friend called herself Rain. It was from a very long time ago. Even before the South Korean singer named himself that. I had a good laugh over that and ask her why Rain?? She says its easy to remember and when it rains, people will think of me.

And now, when it rains, i will remember her.

A Long Winded Rant

In the still of the night... here i am... still awake. A few things to purge out again. Thoughts and so many thoughts. I find that writing about it helps. So its out in the open and out of my mind. Its also to keep my thoughts in writing, so that i can laugh at myself somewhere sometime next year perhaps.

My dad is getting old.. and more forgetful by the day. He had a minor accident three weeks back. He was driving and on his merry way to buy lunch and BOOM! A car did not stop at a junction and dad being on the main road could not stop in time. That BOOM left many cracks.

He was not injured. Just a bump on the head. A bit of a concussion. A bit of disorientation.

When he goes out, i am always concerned when i get a phone call from him. Either the car is stalled (its an old junk) or he's in trouble. The last time an old man on a bicycle with no lights hit him in the mornings, the old man was injured. Not too seriously but he was injured. He sent the old man to the hospital himself. Called me from the hospital and i rushed over. Even though it was not his fault, my dad slowed down and got scared of old people on bicycles.

This recent accident slowed him down even more. Now he is petrified of junctions. Even when i am driving (i am already driving like an old lady). He'll shout.. lookout.. don't go too fast.. slow down slow down. I can remain very calm in many situations. Its years of practise and years of keeping quiet in most situations.

Sometimes i hear a lot of noise. Some of it comes from my dad. Sometimes i tune out. Even in a busy restaurant, my mind tunes out. It is not very kind of me but sometimes my mind is so tired from all the noise.

My dad is a very very picky eater. He complains about everything. Probably he's bored. Probably he just wants to make conversation. If i go out to buy lunch, he'll complain about the food i bring back. He'll complain the dishes are not to his liking. He'll complain there's TOO MUCH RICE (this happens all the time). He'll complain that its too dry.. or the rice is too wet. I can never get it right. I rarely complain about the food that others buy for me. I am always thankful for a meal.

My dad's going thru a chicken rice phase. Everytime he goes out to buy lunch, he'll come back with chicken and rice. I can eat chicken rice everyday. Dommy loves the chicken too. Even when we go out to eat, he orders chicken rice. Mind boggling. He was not much of a chicken rice fan two years back.

Today my dad's car is done and ready. All the cracks fixed. My uncle took him to the workshop the last two times. I didn't go as i had to work and i had some other issues. Today i took him to take his car and we cannot find the shop because he forgot where it was. I made a call to the workshop and they gave me very clear directions. But my dad directed me somewhere else.. and told me to turn another way. Its there.. its behind there. I told him there's no road up ahead. But he insisted that the road was there. Unless i am driving a flying saucer or maybe a bicycle, i can go behind the shops with the road up front. I remain calm and called the workshop again. The workshop was calm enough to repeat the directions again.

This time i didn't listen to him and went on my way. He kept complaining that i am on the wrong road.. and my uncle did not take him on this road... all the way until we reach the workshop. I rest my case.

I remember 5 years ago, we were on this same road, he was in a very foul mood. Mom has just passed away. He was driving fast and faster... scolding all the way. I just closed my eyes and thought that i was going to die if we crashed. He was going so fast and not in the right frame of mind. Accidents happen when angry people drive too fast.

Taking care of my old dad sometimes makes me want to run away. Each time i go to Kuala Lumpur, i abandon everyone and run. I always run. I needed to get away before i cracked too. Maybe one day when i am older, i will regret all these running away. Maybe one day i will wished for more time and wish that my dad will complain more.

When he came home after the accident, he had a major outburst. He was shouting and scolding (not to me) but everyone. It was like a volcano erupted. My sister mentioned that a concussion could spark the outburst. Dom and i got out of his way and just hid in the room. He was angry. I tried to tell him to look at the good side of things. Always look for the better side of every situation. I told him, you are not injured. The car can be fixed. It just money. As long as you are not injured and no one else is killed, we are fine. My siblings who called got hell from him.

His friends called and told him worst case scenarios. I wish i could smack his friends there and then. They told him if he had gone faster and the car hit his car on the driver's side, he could have been injured seriously. When people are in accidents, you do not offer worst case scenarios. That's just so dumb. My dad had an awful night. Shivering and scared. He didn't drive for 2 days.

He's still scared of junctions now.

My new friends from the cattery asked me what am i scared of. They ask me if i am scared of my dad. I just smiled. I am not scared of my dad. Especially at my age, i am definitely not scared. I just do not want situations to be hurtful or stressed. I don't like to pick a fight. I rather keep quiet. Keeping quiet is the worst for anyone who knows what being ignored feels like.

I wish my dad would learn to be happier and not complain about everything and anything. I wish he will learn to be thankful for the little things in life. I wish that he'll learn to look at the brighter side of ever situation. I know its hard for old people to change. Situations have made them what they are today. Being the younger one, we probably just have to learn to accomodate or just run away once in a while.

On another note, my friend is now transfered to a hospital in Penang. She just had her whole breast removed. A doctor is willing to do the operation for her even though her cancer is already everywhere. Only the brain is not affected. She's bedridden, wears diapers and am on a lot of painkillers. Dignity all gone as her sisters have to change her diapers and clean her up.

I was in Kuala Lumpur to see her when she was admitted a forthnight ago. Even though the family preferred less visitors for her as her immune system is very low, we got to see her. They allowed us to spend the afternoon with her in her room. It was a great day. Between the 5 of us, we cracked some stupid jokes, made her laugh.. fed her food... and just be with her. She was very tired when we left. She was glad we all came. She smiled and she was happy.

Maybe if we are lucky, we'll get to see her again in 2 weeks time. Her birthday is in two weeks time. We'll get ourselves to Penang and make her laugh again at our stupid jokes.

After seeing all the suffering she has to go thru, i am thankful that i am able to lift my hands... easily. She is not able to. I am thankful that i can still skip when i walk. I am thankful for many things in my life. Even though dad is a complaining old man, i am thankful that i am able to take care of him.

I am thinking of a week long hiatus in May. Somewhere far away... somewhere i've always wanted to go.

Dogs are easier beings to live with. They don't make a lot of noise. Especially Dom, he's usually quiet unless he hears something/someone at the door. He's happy to just stay by my side when i work. He doesn't complain at all. He's always happy to go for a walk. He's always happy when he gets food.

Dom is getting old too. Still a curly wurly. But still have the heart of a little puppy. Always curious and always skipping and jumping. He forgets he's old.

With that, i end my rant for today. *LOL* Thank you for reading :) zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZ

Everywhere but here...

I am everywhere but here. I have put off writing a post here many times because i feel that if i write something, it will be soppy. Yes.. this is soppy.

Just want to purge it all out anyways and get it out of the way. Some of my sadness for these past few days.. weeks.. months. Its been almost a year. I used to walk with a skip like a kid.. i am happy most days of my life. Life is simple. I don't really ask for much. I lost my skip this year.

When i think of my good buddy, tears just fall when i think of how brave she still is. I can sit here working and tears just fall and i am so overwhelmed with sadness. I stopped keeping appearances everywhere except the shelter. I am at peace there.

My buddy is seeking treatment for her cancer in Bangkok. Even though the chances are very slim, we still push her to go. Its better than doing nothing and waiting at home to die. Two oncologists in Kuala Lumpur has given her the Stage 4 notice. Chemotherapy at this stage of cancer is probably more pain than anything else. Its not an option she wanted to go through with.

So off she went to Bangkok beginning of November. With just whatsapp to keep us in the loop, we can sense her sadness to be away from home and to be away from family. Either that or just wait at home to die. So we went to see her.

She went to see a very old doctor in his 90s in Bangkok. He treats a lot of cancer patients quite successfully. But when he saw my friend, he just told her... be happy. Don't do chemo anymore. He told her he could not help her.

She is a very stubborn person. To deny herself of treatment earlier when things could have worked out better is very stupid. She has her reasons and i still do not understand why she would allow herself to rot this way.

What i expected to see is way beyond what i thought it would be. Its a lot worse. It is even painful to look. Her breasts has rotted and pus and blood is leaking all the time. An open wound so bad that its shocking to someone like me.

We just hang out at the hotel when there's no treatment days. We cook.. eat and laughed and talked about stupid things as usual. If you looked at her, you would not think she has a very very bad sore on her. She looked perky and happy in front of us. A brave front as she always does in front of us. When the pain comes, the tears just flows. She doesn't scream or cry out loud. She just bears with it quietly.

The only places we went to in Bangkok is the supermarket, the 7-eleven and the pharmacy. We didn't really want to be anywhere else but to be with her. Putting on a happy face and smiling in front of her is quite hard. I finally broke down on the last night before we came home. I told her i would not cry in front of her but i did.

She is one of my best buddy through all my silly years. We did a lot of silly things.. dancing, singing, eating and just travelling. We also ate a lot of crabs together. She is my ever willing travel partner too. She never say no to any of my request to see or do things. That's how she is.

Her days are quite numbered. I know the end will be very painful and heartbreaking. I just want her to get home to her family and be happy on her days of grace. I wish for her less pain everyday.

When you have cancer at this late stage, everyone is expecting you to die soon. Even though you don't want to die yet, everyone is wondering when you will go. People taking care of you will wonder when you'll go too when they get too tired of taking care of you and meeting your demands. Its heartbreaking but that's how it is. People want to get on with their own lives.

Maybe she'll live a few years more or she might just outlive me. Who knows. Maybe the treatment she is doing now.. works for her. She'll get another few more years. Who knows.

Hope springs eternal in the human breast;
Man never Is, but always To be blest:
The soul, uneasy and confin'd from home,
Rests and expatiates in a life to come.

I have failed as a friend. Especially a good friend, i did not get her to help herself when she could. Now its probably too late.

A note to GLP's mommy: Thank you so much for the bonfim ribbons. She is carrying a blue one on her wrist now. I don't know if it will work but it did give her some hope. She made 3 wishes too. She has asked me to thank you.

Make hay while the sun shines

My boss told me that we have to make hay while the sun shines. Make Hay.. Make Hay he says. Usually he doesn't come up with such phrases. He's usually a yes.. no.. k... go ahead kinda guy. So i ask for some hay. That made him laugh but he did send me some hay.

Summer holidays are almost over but we didn't seem to have our lull period this year. We had Myanmar... and we have a lot of things to do with Myanmar.

With the extra hay, i sent my dad and nephew off to Krabi for a short holiday. A 20 and a 70+ year old man. What could possibly go wrong in Krabi? Its just a collection of islands. For starters.. they almost missed their flight as the checking in queue became too long when they spent too much time having lunch at McDs.. *LOL* But it went smoothly after that. They even got to go to Nosey Parker for elephant rides thru the jungle. My dad have never sat on an elephant before so he had a good time i think.

I had a great time when i was in Krabi with my lover urmm friend. We went on motorcycle rides without helmets and went everywhere without a care in the world. It was a very happy time and we almost missed our flight out too. We were staying 2 islands away from the airport and the ferry wait was horrendous. But Ko Lanta was beautiful. It was memorable to just be... there.

We (my siblings and i) sometimes become overly protective of my dad. I do not allow my dad to drive at night as his eyesight is not too great on one eye. I drive him to church on Saturdays. But other than that, i don't really do everything for him. Sometimes he just gets lazy and be with his ipad for many hours a day and keeps sighing and sighing.. he's bored.. hahahhahaha. When my mom was around, these two siamese twins will go everywhere together. If you see one, you'll see the other.

When we go on holidays, we would prefer that people do not call us. I didn't call them at all. If they are in trouble, they will call me. I am sometimes overly confident that they will be okay. On the other hand, my eldest sister insist on calling all the time. She even called me from Hong Kong Disneyland to complain about dad. *LOL* I told her to put down the damn phone and go enjoy Disney. Crazy.. yes.. i have quite a circus in the family.

I stay with my dad with Dommy and some strange cats at the porch. Boy comes back during his semester breaks. Its a strange arrangement but i seem to be the most convenient one to take care of my old man. Dad doesn't really need taking care of. He's usually up and about by 6.30am and off to meet his friends at the park. As long as he is happy (and just a tad bored), i guess we'll just keep on staying here till we find new adventures.

My mom passed away 5 years ago. I spent the first 3 years grieving and just blanked out. Each day i had to deal with a very angry dad who compares my cooking with mom's. He pushes so much that sometimes i just cry and cry at night. Most of the time i was just crying because i missed my mom. After 3 years i discovered the tv again. It became a place to just numb the weariness of the day away.

This year, i realised that i was watching too much tv and just not doing anything productive with myself. I do know how to do a lot of things but i don't do it because i am lazy. After one of those days when too much cat watching got me into trouble again with dad, i went to seek shelter.

I've always have a very close unit of friends and colleagues. I missed them all the time as they are in another town and state. My colleagues were like my sisters. The longest hours of my life used to be when i am in the office. We laughed and joked and did all the stupid things. We bitched too but when one is in trouble, we always get together to help out. When mom passed away, the whole group of them came all the way in a taxi to just see my mom and me. They being here with me touched me deeply.

I found my shelter in the arms of some furries. While i am not doing that much to help them, they have in turn helped me a lot by making me smile more and be happy. I made quite a lot of new friends too. Some old, some young and quite a funny mixture of people. I am practically the kid in the group.

On Sunday mornings, i sneak off to the shelter and help them take photographs of the shelter cats to post them on facebook. I've always loved how HeARTs Speak helps the shelters by using photos and art to effect social change. I am not as good as the photographers in HeARTs Speak but practise makes perfect. I'll get there some day.

A picture can speak a thousand words. A good picture of my furry friends can up their chances of getting adopted. Taking pictures of cats is quite easy as some of them loved to pose and they don't really move much. You just got to sit with them for a few hours.. play with them.. connect and you become part of them. Usually i shoot blind as i want to connect by looking at them... they look back and i get a good head shot. I've never really seen so many different types of cats in one place. They are so beautiful and each have their own special traits.

Usually i'll take a few hundred pictures on a Sunday and post their pictures on the days that follow till i get to Sunday again. They i go seek my shelter again. Sometimes its about me needing them more than they needed me. They helped me find my balance... somehow.

Some of the furries have become my friends and most of them will just wait their turn to jump on my lap. Its heartwarming and fulfilling. Some of them have been in the shelter for a long time. Our shelter in Ipoh is a no-kill shelter. That also means that we have to go the extra mile to get some adopted so that there will never be overcrowding.

I do not know if you'll be able to view this short movie above (which is a mighty big file). They are of some of my friends at the shelter.

On another note, i went to see my friend last weekend in Kuala Lumpur. She still have not decided to go for the mastectomy yet. She'll probably live longer than me perhaps or go out with a bang. Who knows what tomorrow will bring. But its her life and if she chooses to go this way, we as friends will support her and try to be happy when we are with her. I would have liked to just club her and dragged her off to the hospital to get the tumour out but the laws do not allow me to do such foolish things. A person still has the right to choose how he/she wants to live.

We had a good weekend just laughing about stupid things. We talked about crap and crapping. Laughed about dumbness and how dumbness do not solve problems but it was a good weekend. Here's my friend again. Her hair has grown. Her short crop is quite nice. The other girl is my good buddy too. Can you see me... ? I'm the one in the middle with the camera *LOL*

My poor Dommy has been so patient with me and with my unfaithfulness. When i come back from the shelter, he's usually so happy he'll do leaps on his thin legs. Why we should always adopt and give a chance to older dogs/cats to have a forever home. Rescued dogs and cats will come with a history but most of them are grateful. They are grateful for a warm meal, a warm bed and someone to love.

When i was growing up with asthma, i was not allowed to touch or go near animals with furs. My dad still am afraid of me spending most of my time with Dom. Dom is furry.. hehehehehe He'll probably have a fit if he knows i am at the shelter with so many cats. Sometimes we are too afraid to die we forget to live.

Whatever we do, i guess the most important thing is making the moment count. Just be with the people and furries that makes you happy. Everyday is a bonus.

February 13 and 14... stop blinking because a whole week went by

Blinking. I should probably stop blinking because time just goes missing each time i blink. We are trying hard for a post a week. *LOL* But a whole week went by and no blogging and not much commenting got done. And so... i should tape my eyelid down and stop blinking. ^.*

** Kids... please do not try to do this at home. Taping of the eyelids should only be done by blinking adults and done under expert supervision.

February 13... my dad turns 71. Since it was a weekday, none of my siblings could make it home. But Boy was home for his weeklong break from uni and dad was very happy. We bought a tiramisu cake and took it to my aunts house to celebrate it with my lil nephew who shares the same birthday as my dad. So James and Jayden both celebrated their birthday together.

Being the cruel cow that i am, i bought a lil plastic figurine that kinda resembles my dad. The resemblance is quite shocking *LOL* Well.. my dad is not as bald as Gargamel but the facial resemblance is quite close. Everyone had a good laugh and that lil figurine would be making more appearances for all my dad and all his siblings birthday.

the tiramisu... which was quite delicious

Jayden's cake was made by my aunt. It has all the characters of his favourite shows and that really put a big smile on the kid's face.

Here's Jayden playing with dad's ipad. He just turned two. Dom is waiting his turn to play on the ipad. He's worried as his vegetable plot in the Smurf village is almost ready to harvest.

We took dad to this place with those strange colourful lights to have his birthday meal. It has a good environment and very nice waiters. The food's not all that bad too.

Ahhhh... February 14. The day for lovers and for some people to make loads of money from flowers and chocolates. This simple drawing on the calendar is kinda sweet. You don't see much of these kind of drawings nowadays. I love this type of calendar as I get to tear a page out everyday. Its made of very very thin paper. Kinda like tissue.

February 14 is also a lonely day for introverts like me that do not have a other half yet. So i hopped on the train and went to Kuala Lumpur to celebrate this lonely day with some good friends. I waved at a friend who was in a straw skirt by his office window when i was passing by his office. But i guess he thought that i was just pulling a fast one on him when i said WAVE. *LOL*

We had a good meal at this place called Serai. Just four good friends sharing a giggle and some laughs. We had a very very sweet pavlova to tie up the meal. Being the glutton that i am, i forgot to take the picture of the pavlova to share with you guys. It was a very pretty pavlova.

Serai means lemongrass. Malaysians used a lot of lemongrass in their cooking.

We had some Kilkennys later in the night. Its been quite a while since i had a pint. I think i was very thirsty :p

Actually i was in Kuala Lumpur for some work too. Mr P was so happy to see me, he was running in circles. I think i kinda miss my Curly when i was in Kuala Lumpur as i kept calling Dom when i talking to Piper. No wonder he was looking at me funnily when i called him Dom.

We went for some walkies in the morning and some more walkies in the evening.

Mr P smelling some weeds flowers along the way. We met some kids on bicycles in the evenings and one of them even greeted Piper. *LOL* He was just cycling by and said.. Hi Mr Poofball. I guess Piper is getting more well known as the poofball in this neighbourhood.

We met a worm... and many many worms along the way. There were quite a lot of worms early in the morning. I bet these worms were going for a morning stroll. A lot of them got squashed by the early morning joggers. One even cling on to Piper's feet for dear life and came home with us. If we collected all the worms from the morning walks, we could go fishing with them.

Mr P got really tired from all the walks and promptly fell asleep after all the walks. Even though he has a pretty nice comfy bed, he prefers to lie on the stack of newspapers on the floor. That to him is the best spot to sleep.

Part of his bed is still not dry yet... but he insists on sleeping in it.

Mr P in his comfy bed. He feels very safe in his bed but he is still very afraid of thunder. Maybe i should buy him a thundershirt. Can anyone tell us if the thundershirt really works? Cos Mr Poofball is really really scared when there's lightning and thunder.

Ahhh... i guess you all must have missed Curly. Here he is now. He is getting a bit curly wurly and all his furry self is outta place. He will haveta be groomed this week to greet a special someone who will be coming back this Saturday. We really can't wait until Saturday comes.

GROOM??? i don't need a groom. I look perfectly handsome. 

Don't you think so? 

I am just hungry. Will ya feed me please.

Pretty please...

Please don't mind the mess behind Dom. I am not very good at housekeeping. ^.^

We will try to post once a week... or once a forthnight. *LOL* We will be hitting the road again this Saturday. Till we meet again. Be safe... be happy and always forgive.. and forget.

 

i pinch this from somewhere... credits to urmm... google

A Wander Thru the Nooks and Crannies

Thank you all for the birthday wishes. I am grinning like an idiot now. I am not 50 yet.. but gonna get there soon one day. Sorry for lying but women always lie about their age right? You all have been very kind with your comments and telling me that running away is okay. Sometimes we all need to get away for a while if we could. Its always refreshing and its good for the soul. Just remember to come back to the loved ones and the furries.

People like me get to run away more because i am not attached to a pole ^.^ I got a bunch of very close friends. We go wayyyyy back. The kind of friends that you can talk about fart and poos. *LOL* The ones that you can pick off from where you left off even if its been years.

I've know them for more than 20 years. Some of them are attached with families while some of us are still hanging single. Sometimes we travel in a pack like wolves. It all depends on who's available and who's free at that moment in time.

I have travelled with a lot of different people to different places. Sometimes i love to go solo as not everyone likes to travel with a crazy photographer who takes pics of all the doors and windows along the way :)

I am still kinda looking for a lonely planet traveller who will go places with me. One who is not afraid of the rough road ahead. One who does not mind roughing it out at the backpackers inn. And one who will love to photograph doors and windows just like my crazy head.

On this trip to Malacca, we stayed at a hoity toity place as it was my day and we decided to go hoity toity as it was the 11-11-11. The next time this date comes around again, it will be a hundred years. I don't think i will still be around in a hundred years. We want to remember when we are old and crinkly that we had hoity toity before :) We are sometimes a bit impulsive. It was supposed to be a party of three of us but one of my friends could not get off work.

The Majestic Hotel is an old mansion which was built in the 1920s. Having retained its old facade, it is quite a stunning building. Every corner is a breathtaking sight. The walls holds many secrets i am sure. I went a little crazy with the camera here. Stepping into this building is like taking a step back in time.

Before we booked into this hotel, we were afraid that there might be spooky spooks to greet us at night as it is an old building. No spooky spooks came by that night :)

This is The Library in the old mansion. Tea is served here. This lady in the pink kebaya was just going about doing her work of setting up the tables for tea.

Some of the corners at the lobby has this glass jars. The glass jars hold some light snacks. It was a nice touch.

The hotel overlooks a village called Kampung Morten. A traditional village with kampung houses in old Malacca architectural style. I've been to Malacca many many times but i have never stumbled here before.

This is a living museum called Villa Sentosa here in the village. A very friendly old man manages the place. He'll answer all your questions with a big big smile on his face.

There are some homestays here and the next time we come again to Malacca, we will be checking out the homestays for a different experience.

We will show you where we met some pretty juicy interesting men in our next post :)

I think i have been quite lucky all my life. My family loves me. I get to do what i want most of the time and i got a job which i love. I get to run away sometimes. I only get nagged once in a while. But don't mind the old folks. They might be long windy winded but they nagged because the love you. I even know how to switch off my ears if the nagging gets too long. I have trained my ears to be like the radio switches :)

Lost For Words

Trying to sound positive is getting harder each time i lift up the phone to give my friend a call. Today she's having her second chemotherapy session. We laughed and joked a lot yesterday. She said she was checking into the hotel hospital hotel at 8am today. Chemo usually starts at 3pm for her. She said she'll give me a call when its done and if its better this time. I still have not got a call yet and its midnight now. Guess it didn't go too well today. I will have to wait till tomorrow to give her a call.

The first session went well. I had to tell her lies. Her husband and i have to tell her some lies. Many lies to get her to remain positive before the first session. She was scared to death and she was shivering. Up against the unknown. When she was done with that first session, she told me... you lied. You said its not going to be painful. Even though we both knew that it was going to be a rough journey ahead, sometimes we have to tell little white lies to get things going first.

I've known this friend for almost 20 years. A very long time. She used to sit behind me in college and used to ask me to draw for her sometimes. Sometimes she annoys me to the maximum with her constant noise but we always have good laughs. She almost got both of us drowned when we were at the waterfalls on one of our outings with the class. I knew how to swim but she did not. She just pulled me down when she panicked and tried to get air. Good thing someone pulled us to the side. Till today, she still laughed about how she almost got us both drowned.

She weaved in and out of my life through the 20 years of friendship. We can tell each other everything and we can be quite brutally frank about everything else. I've always asked her... do you want to hear the real thing or do you want me to cook up stories? Sometimes she prefers i cook up some stories when she cannot accept certain facts at that moment.

She called me last week while she was driving and on her way home to see her mom. She tells me of her hair that is thinning so much that her scalp is showing. She is too afraid to look at the mirror. I told her, all your hair will be gone by the 2nd or 3rd session. You will be bald. That's being quite brutally frank. She took it with a very very heavy heart. I said again.. Good News.. all your hair will be back.. much better looking after the 6th session. We could go out and check out some wigs. You can even be a blonde for a while. We both laughed.

Ever since her dad passed away, she went back every weekend to see her mom in Kampar. Each and every weekend, she drives home alone. A two hour drive that can sometimes go up to three or four hours if there's a public holiday. A most devoted daughter. I wouldn't be able to drive home every weekend if i was still working in Kuala Lumpur. It is most tiring to be doing it every week.

I have had an aunt and cousin who has gone through cancer and lost their battles midway. I know that some of you out there have won your battles against cancer. But it is never easy.

The side effects from chemotherapy can be quite bad for some. I just hope that she'll have a smoother road ahead. Two down and four more to go.

I told her, if anyone is going to beat this cancer, it will be you. If anyone can get through this chemotherapy, it will be you. I try to believe it myself too.

I am not lost for words. I am just lost in my thoughts lately. I have and need to just purge it out.

My apologies for not dropping by most of your blogs. Soon.. i'll send Dommy over soon... soonest he wakes up.

"It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them."
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

A Week Later...

Its been a week since we last posted.. *LOL* We tried. We did try to post but soonest we did, we got sidetracked elsewhere. We have cut down on our cat watching :) Dom said that if i didn't post soon, he'll ignore me and won't let me rub his curly tummy. Hmmmm...

Last weekend was nice. A time to catch up with some folks and a time for the older folks to catch up with extended families. Since i am much of a lazy bugger lately, we'll post more pictures hopefully next Wednesday when we should be doing the Wordless :)

@ the gravesite

My ole car coughed its way to Lenggong... and brought us back safely. We just couldn't keep up with the Evo and the Civic. The X-trail was wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ahead because the passengers had to be back to Kuala Lumpur in the afternoon. But we made it slowly... and surely.

Lenggong is still Lenggong. Very much the same as how i saw it when i was a kid. Its like a cowboy town with 2 rows of shops on the main street. The bus station is the same as how my grandpa had left it a very long time ago (Grandpa used to be the station master there). The freshwater fishballs (saito fishballs) are still the same. Just very expensive now for a tiny ball. But its super duper delicious and should not be missed if you ever make it here to Lenggong.

Not much going on there anymore as more and more young people have moved to bigger towns. But... they are building a big maternity hospital beside the big graveyard. How spooky can that be. Or maybe someone is pulling our legs about the hospital.

The road to Lenggong is not too windy now. There's a new highway that takes us there in half the time. My sister used to be sick in the car all the way to Lenggong. The trunk road is a super nice route to drive if you like the left and right and left and right driving. It used to be that windy all the way.

One of these days, I might just gather a few friends and drive all the way to Betung, Thailand. My uncle told me it only took him 3 hours to get there from Ipoh. But i drive like an old lady, so it might take us 4.

On our way back to Ipoh, we stop by another smaller town along the way. Sauk. This is where we had our lunch.. and the one hour wait for the food to be served is well worth it.

The famous freshwater fishballs... when you bite into it, the taste is divine.. *LOL*

Fish stomach cooked in garlic ginger sauce...

I don't remember if this was pork or chicken... but it was cooked in some sweet sauce ;)

The food pictures above are for my sisters to drool over. That's my wicked revenge to them for not making it home. WAHAHAHAHA... they sure know what they have missed now.

After they served the third dish, i dump the camera quickly and ate to my hearts content. The fishballs were flying off the plate in two blinks of an eye. *LOL* My aunt asked me, don't you want to take the rest of the dishes? No way... i am famished. I should have.. i know. The catfish was really big and fresh and deeeeeeeeelicious. But i was famished. Next time i'll try to have more control :)

Sunday evening i got a call from a close friend. She said that she has a watermelon in her that is growing too fast and she was scheduled for surgery on Tuesday. Her fibroid grew too fast and too furiously. We talked and she was very worried. She kept asking me, how can this happen. The doctor said that he might need to remove her womb if its bad inside. Given a choice of having a child one day and saving your life now, you don't really have much of a choice when things like this happen.

Her surgery went well. She's still weak and can hardly speak. But she'll recover fast. She's a trooper. Her womb is saved.

Another very close friend called me on Tuesday to tell me her checkup was not good. She has multiple breast lumps and they have to be removed soon. A quick scan showed that she had multiple fibroids too. A double dose of trouble. A history of breast cancer running in the family is not a good thing too.

Sometimes we hope that things like this will not happen to us. We feel that it can only happen to other people but not us. But when it does, what do we do.

One day at a time. We go one day at time. Seize the day today. Carpe diem.

The All Weather Friend

A good friend is cheaper than therapy.  ~ Author Unknown

At certain stage of our lives, we keep certain friends. Sometimes we have the convenient friend and if we are lucky, we have the all weather friend for life.

I have a couple of friends which are probably more like my sisters and some of them are the all weather ones. We've gone through good times and bad and sometimes extremely "happy times".

The "happy times" were the days when i would sit at a counter stool and sip some spirits at some watering hole in town with them. Sometimes over a pint of kilkenney, the floor would suddenly seem very far from where we sat on the stools. But that was like when i was in my twenties. The days of no care and no responsibility.

The all weather friend will do the obvious crazy with you. I remember the day when we found out that we have locked our car key in the car (don't ask me how we manage to do that) but we decided to drink first and worry later. *LOL*

The all weather friend was also the one who will stay with you under the stars to wait for the meteor rain all night but not seeing anything the whole night because of cloudy nights.

The all weather friend will also keep promises to perform your last rites for you if you should conk suddenly one day no matter where they are at that time.

I have a certain all weather friend. We have spent many good years together. We have also spent many years apart in different continents but still manage to pick up where we left off.

My all weather friends are never angry or bitter with me. We always have good laughs each time we meet up. And who really needs therapy when we have friends.  I should count myself lucky to always have friends and family on most part of my journey in life.
I read somewhere today that there's a Rent a Friend thingy on the web. For a fee, you can have a friend for an hour.

A Journey With Fellow Friends

Today is my last day of bachelorhood again (no.. i am not getting married). There goes my days of eating bachelor food and living a bachelor life with just a Curly.

My dad will be back this evening from his long holidays from Thailand to Kuala Lumpur and lastly to China. I have been having a couple of weeks of "freedom" which led to my laziness and lots of tv dinners plus acute tv addiction. It was fun while it lasted.

Curly and i came back home yesterday from our roadtrip to Kuala Lumpur. The house was dusty and floors were sandy but it is good to be home again. I am sure dad can't wait to be home too.

We left on Wednesday evening for Kuala Lumpur. I did consider taking the new electric train but i didn't want to leave Curly at the boarding place. Both Piper and Dom came back quite dazed the last time we sent them. There is no decent boarding place for pets where i stay or maybe i have not found one decent one yet. They either get sick or come back dazed and disorientated. We can only trust our own families to take care of our furfellows.

my co-driver trying to keep awake

it was getting dark by the time we got there

The next day, i joined a couple of friends on the intercity trains at the central hub to our destination. We didn't want to drive as it would probably be too tiring to drive down and back in the evening. We were like a bunch of excited kids on our journey. We had two virgin first timer train travellers among us. It was quite an experience for them to do the balancing trick in the loo on a moving train. *LOL*

We got stuck here

Halfway through the journey, the train stopped at the Tampin station and the station master came on board and told us that they are stopping for 15mins. He even asked us to check out the stall by the station for some snacks and hot drinks. This is pretty odd as they would usually prefer the commuters not to wander too far.

We went down to check out the snacks... but were too afraid to sit down and have a meal as we do not want to run after the train if it starts to move *LOL* Back on the train.. and we waited for the 15 mins to be up. 30 mins and no sign of the train moving. 45 mins and we began to worry as we have another train to catch to go back to the city in the evening.

We went down the train and looked around. Some fellas were looking at the tracks ahead of us. A train track machine seems to be lopsided on the tracks. I asked my friend to look too.. and horror of horrors... the machine has indeed fallen off the track. We asked the station workers and they finally told us it would take another hour or two to move that machine and lift it back on the tracks.

We got someone to help us get a taxi... grab our stuffs from the train and scoot. In the taxi for the ride of our life. The taxi was flying so fast on the trunk roads, we were fearing for our lives. At some point along the way.. we told him.. double line double line.. then it was car coming..lorry coming... break break break (ops! it should be brakes). *LOL* We were breaking for him on our own on imaginary breaks in the car. Bet the taxi driver wanted to just tell us to shutup. They know the roads very well.

We reach our destination in one piece thanks to one of them who was praying very hard.

I saw my boss whom i have not seen for a few years (but he still pays me on the dot every month) and some friends from the Singapore office. We should probably try and meet up more often and not only under such circumstances only.

 Segamat. Pretty big town. I always love these hand-drawn signboards.

When it was time to go, we were taken to the railway station in Segamat but the northbound train was delayed for another 2 and half hours. We told ourselves, no more daredevil taxi rides on trunk roads, so we went looking for a bus to take us back to Kuala Lumpur. We were just walking towards the bus station when a northbound bus stopped beside us and ask us if we wanted to go to Kuala Lumpur (we probably look like a bunch of lost fellas). Packing silly smiles, we boarded the bus quickly and went on our way home.

Even though the journey was long, someone was looking out for us all the way. I kinda think that Mr Mathew helped us in a way. He got us there and home safe in pretty good time.

In The Garden ~ Alan Jackson

Mr Mathew was a very kind and quiet man. He shall be sorely missed by all that knew him. May He Rest in Peace.

May you find comfort in this song Anne.

Chit-Chatting Over Coffee

Are you a coffee addict? I am i am and i am. Not the usual starbucks kind of coffee addiction. Its the any coffee kind of addiction. But its still under control :) My hands do not shake yet... if i don't have my coffee fix. If i get to that point of shaky hands addiction, i'll need to be detoxed.

Too much of a good thing is not good. Anything in moderation is fine.

Usually i'll have a cuppa in the morning.. the wake me up coffee that glids into my stomach and coats everything and sends a big grin up to my silly face. One more in the late afternoon if i get too sleepy to work. Too many coffees do make me sluggish in the end. So i try to keep it at two. Coffee does stain my teeth more and more. Its beyond repairable. But i am way too old to be bothered by that now :D

I had a caramel macchiato yesterday. Fancy name and fancy coffee. I was at Starbucks. I can't really tell the difference between a latte or a macchiato. To me... coffee is coffee.

Each time they ask me for the size of my coffee.. i would like.. urmm... and look at the picture again *LOL* If it was simply Small, Regular or Large like McDonalds.. it would be easier. They have Tall, Venti or Grande but Tall is not the tallest cup of coffee. They sure confuse me each and everytime i go there. I can never seem to remember their cup sizes.

When this bunch of friends and i catch up for a chat, it is usually a long chat. When i was working in Kuala Lumpur, we would meet almost every week. To find new places/things to eat or chat for hours on end. I don't know why we have so much to talk about... hahhahahaa

I have a few friends.. a few good friends. I've known them for quite a long time. Some are married and some are still single and hanging like me. We have grown quite old over the years. We still giggle like a bunch of morons. We still talk too loud sometimes too.

Our conversations lasted about 5 hours. Just the four of us. We talked about the weirdest things sometimes. One minute we were talking about pregnancy and childbirth and confinement... and then one of them was telling me about the Roomba she just bought for her small apartment. We had a good laugh over that because the apartment is so small. A roomba is quite useless because all she did when she turned it on was to watch it move and following it closely with her eyes to check if it misses a spot. It would be much easier to just sweep the floor *LOL*

Then we talked about parents and siblings and then it was about some mop from cosway that comes with a pail and costs a bomb.... and then it was babies milk from soya milk to breast milk to cows milk and handphones. Then it was about kindergardens and schools.. hehhehehe Then it was a debate about private schools and national schools.

We could be talking for another 12 hours if time permits. The coffee did help :) We sure do have a lot to talk about. I haven't been much of a friend since i moved back to Ipoh three years ago. I hardly had much time to go out. I don't even make an effort to go out at all except to the market or to get dog/household supplies. I should make more time for them. They are my closest friends.

But with really good friends... you can always pick up from where you left off :)

Do you love coffee as much as i do? My favourite coffee is still Kopi Cap Gajah (one elephant and not the one with two elephants).. quite a famous coffee from my hometown. Somehow.. that coffee is evergreen. I got the picture here in my computer somewhere... i'll look for it tomorrow :)