About Stephy

Today is Stephanie's birthday. She would have been 43 today.

I grew up with Stephanie, her sisters and mine. We were grandma's Seven Fairies. Everywhere we go, our uncles and aunts will call us the Seven Fairies. The other younger ones that came later... they never made it to Grandma's list of Seven Fairies.

Our houses were just a stone throw away. We share many laughter and happy times. When we grew older and i moved to Kuala Lumpur... we didn't spend much time anymore. I always regard her as "Tai Ka Che" meaning Big Sister. She was our Big Sister to all of us.

Sometimes i think in our haste to find ourselves, we forget about the ones at home. While finding our own goals and life, we all drifted apart.

When i came back after mom passed away, she tried to be Big Sister to me again. Me and my time management, i never did find the time to spend time with her. In my mind's eye... we still got a lifetime. She'll call me sometimes and said she is dropping food over. And sometimes she'll send me things that she has baked.

In our own hurried world, we never made time to chat. We took it for granted that we'll always have time when we are old and gray.

Her cancer came quick and vicious. Since the day she found out she had cancer, she only had 3 more months to live. And less than 3 months, she is gone.

I remember when i was away during the holidays to welcome Bebe J, i worried every night that i might not make it to see her again. When i landed, first thing sis did was take me to the hospital. She was lying there.. and she held my hand really tight. She wanted to see pictures of Bebe J. She was so happy she smiled and said she is auntie again.

Her last few days of battle, even in her very confused state of mind, she wrote notes to her children and her family. Her eyes open once in a while and when she could, she wrote many many notes. Her will to live was remarkable. She didn't want to die but it was her time to go. In her state of confusion on the last days, she still wrote that she saw me.

On her last day before she left us, i held her hands again. It was cold. I was praying hard and ask God to just take her home :(

She has lived a good life. She has seen many places and travelled far and wide. She is great mother and a wonderful wife.

Sometimes i wonder why some people would want to put an end to their lives when life throw them a curveball. When life is tough, keep on going and keep on moving. When things go wrong, try harder and find the light at the end. Live life to the fullest because we only get one life... so let's make it a fulfilled one.

Stephanie wanted to live but her time was up.

God Bless Your Soul Stephy and May You Rest In Peace.